My Happy Place {Spin Cycle}

When I was going through cancer treatments, I tried to visualize a happy place to get me through the procedures. I started off by thinking about a grassy green meadow, with a blue sky above, and maybe some yellow flowers dotted throughout the grass. That happy place usually lasted only about five seconds, and then I would be distracted. I didn’t mind watching the phlebotomist draw my blood or the nurse pumping chemotherapy into my vein. It was actually a fascinating process, once I got over the fact that I had cancer.

My cancer treatments were completed long before I had Lily and Emmy. When Lily was little, she spent more time in hospital waiting rooms than many people have, and it had nothing to do with me. Before she was two, my brother was in a motorcycle accident and was in the hospital and rehabilitation for six months. Ed’s mom was in and out of the hospital due to rheumatoid arthritis and Parkinson’s disease. Then after twenty-five years, my own mother’s cancer was back with a vengeance.

It was a rough few years. I cried a lot. Lily and Emmy saw me cry a lot, and since they were so little, a toddler and a preschooler, they asked me why I was crying.

How do you explain the ache that you feel when your own mother dies? It was an ache I couldn’t bear to talk about. When the tears came, Ed would tell the girls, “Go make your mother feel better.” And they would come over to me, hug me and give me sweet baby kisses.

They are my happy place. Forget the green meadow with the yellow flowers and the blue sky. If I am with my daughters, I am happy.

Alaska cabin window

There are times, however, when I need to get away from my children. It is nice to go to a conference or have a night away. Ever since we spent the night in this cabin in Talkeetna, Alaska, I’ve longed to go on a writing retreat. Wouldn’t this little cabin be the perfect happy place?

Whenever I do travel with Lily and Emmy, I always miss my babies. And I always know that as much as I enjoy being away, my happy place is waiting for me at home.

Where is your happy place and what does it look like? Thank you for inspiring the prompt this week, Tamara (Tamara Like Camera)!

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19 Responses to My Happy Place {Spin Cycle}

  1. For sure my happy place is when my kids and husband are with me. There is no other place so happy for me (My kids are both in their 20s). We do not all get together often enough, but there is nothing like having family around. Just thinking about them makes me happy.
    Raquel recently posted…Pear Feta Fall SaladMy Profile

  2. What a sweet, heartfelt post!! Love that your girls are your happy place!!
    I would say that my boys are my happy place most of the time – the rest of the time it is definitely working out!!!
    Kim recently posted…Bullet ThoughtsMy Profile

  3. This is so sweet. I have thought similar things, only I’ve been fortunate to not spend lots of time in hospital waiting rooms. I am fortunate enough to have a beautiful back yard. I get so frustrated keeping it tidy that I forget to sit with my coffee and enjoy it. 🙂
    Lauralee recently posted…Teaching PrepositionsMy Profile

    • I completely understand! I’ve been struggling to get my posts written for the Spin Cycle and haven’t been keeping up with my blog reading! It seems like I’m always on the go.

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